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May 29, 2022

695. When Good Habits Turn Bad.

695. When Good Habits Turn Bad.

You know all about good habits, and you've felt the effects of bad habits, but rarely do you ever notice when a good habit turns bad until it's too late. That's because habits gradually build up or erode, and if left unchecked, you'll "all of the sudden" slip into complacency.

"Always become. Never arrive," because the arrivals can wreck everything you've worked for.

If your pants fit too tight, your bank account looks skinny, or your relationship has hit a lull, this is a good primer episode for you to get back in the game.

Links to episodes mentioned:
Episode #412 "ACA: Action Cures All. "
Episode #668: "Is The Lead Worth The Lag?"
Episode #687: "Motivation isn't coming. PBE: Positive Benefits Every day. "

This episode is on YouTube!

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Transcript

today on the sales life is an episode about habits and you know about good habits. And you've definitely felt the effects of bad habits, . But rarely do you ever notice when good habits turn bad until it's too late? It's the in-between that's because habits gradually build up and habits gradually erode. And this is why I say always become, never arrive because it's the arrival. Once you achieve the goal, you get lulled to sleep and the once good habits that you had creep backwards and your bad habits begin to creep forward. So if you're starting to find that your pants are fitting a little tight, or your finances are getting a little skinny. Or maybe your relationships have hit a little bit of a lull, I'm going to give you some primers using previous episodes that you can reference back to along with the 3 1, 2, 1 method but before we roll out, let me introduce myself. My name is Marsh Buice, and I created The Sales Life because the number one skill that you need to never settle and be ready for anything is the ability to sell, but you don't have to be in sales to learn how to sell. I'll take the 20 plus years of skills that I've learned in the sales profession. And I'll show you how I've applied these to every area of my life. And now you can too using five core skills that you already have within , now I'm going to help you develop them. So you'll never go without On the sales life, you'll learn how to negotiate with yourself and others using communication and productive confrontation. You'll learn about the power of curiosity because there's more out there that you don't know than you do know. And you'll get a lot further asking questions than making statements. You'll also learn the skill of creativity. When you lack resources, how to get resourceful, got to get scrappy, but the foundation to it all is continuous learning. And then taking action on what you've learned. So if you're trying to get back up after life has slapped you down, or you're trying to move up after life has stalled out, learn how to sell because sales is life. Life is sales. Welcome to the sales life. Let's get on with today's episode. Your habits can bring your desires to reality, but your habits can also turn your dreams into nightmares. And today I want to show you how sneaky habits can be and to do that. I just want to use weight loss as an example. So let's say for instance, I lost 30 pounds and if I don't set a new target, a new challenge, then what's going to happen is I'm going to give the results back. Just like tiny habits can get you to your goal. Tiny habits can also sneak all the results away. Check this out. You've lost 30 pounds. Congratulations. You look good. You feel good? You are high school fine... you're fitting in pants. You never fit in before everybody's patting you on your back. Everybody's wanting to know what your secret is. You hold your chin up a little bit. You're riding. And you decide, you know what, just once I'm going to celebrate. You decide, you know, I've done without this double burger with a fried egg and extra pickles I've done without for so long. So I'm gonna smash it a little bit. as a matter of fact, give me a double order of fries. And you're a little bit guilty when you eat it. Right. And in the back of your head, you're saying, oh, it's okay, man. I'll work it off. As soon as you get up from the table, you, you look in the restaurant glass to see how your gut looks and seems to be okay. And the following morning, man, you wake up and you're like, whew, I better go get on the scale. And you get on the scale and nothing has changed. And you know, that's not really the case yet. Somewhere deep down inside, You say, maybe I can get away with this. Maybe I've become one of those people. Who can eat anything and get away with it. don't you hate those people, they just smash anything they want. And they just still shredded, still ripped and you forget how hard literally blood, sweat, and tears, it took to get to where you are. You eat, you smash it, you wake up, nothing changed. This is where habits get so sneaky because you're not quite so rigid in your working out the next week, still kind of playing with you a little bit and your friend calls up who you hadn't seen in a few years. And says, why don't you come meet me? You got nothing going on and let's catch up. All right, because you already feeling good about yourself. Your confidence is sky high. So you spend a weekend with your friend and y'all light up the town. There. Ain't a weight a cardio. Routine anywhere, remotely close in your mind. So you keep rocking. And you come back in town and there's a little bump on the scale. You feel a little groggy. This is where "all of the sudden" begin to creep in. This is why these habits slowly, they start off as cobwebs that you can easily break. Then they become ropes. Then they become chains and eventually shackles ...this is what habits do they're so sneaky Because what happens is your results begin to inch backwards and your poor habits are inching forward. So those of you who are watching this episode on video, you'll be able to see what I'm talking about. Those of you who are listening, I'm going to depict it for you. And if you're in a parking lot, do this for me. If you're driving, do it later, but hold both of your hands out in front of you. Okay. Now your right hand, hold it out. As far out in front of you, as you. With your fingers turned inward and then hold your left hand closest to your face. Your right hand represents all of your hard work, all of your results. Congratulations, your left hand represents all of your bad habits. And as you can see, you've distanced yourself from those things this is why habits are sneaky... Because let's go back to the analogy of look good, feel good, smash a double meat burger with a fried egg and extra pickle and a double load of fries. When you eat that your results microinches come back and your poor habits, micro millimeters inch forward. It's so. Subtle. You don't even notice it get on the scale, nothing, but just because you don't see change doesn't mean that change isn't happening because what's happened too. Is those things that you desperately got away from, they flood your memories again. And now that you've had that taste, it's like blood in the water. Now, all of a sudden you have those cravings again. It's like they ignited them again. And it ignited it. And then, because the results don't show you still look good, feel good and everything good. So you think you can get away with it ...a friend comes in town, smashed the weekend right-hand results. Come back just a little bit. Left-hand poor habits, inch forward, just a little bit. Come back in town, you had a lot of stuff going on at work. So you're not quite so urgent. As far as working out, you may work out instead of seven days a week. You may work out four. Bad habit. Creeps forward results. Stay about the same, nothing moves. Then a big project comes up at work. Can't work out at all this week. Bad habits inch forward. Gotta eat on the go. Can't leave for work. Can't do the meal prep, bad habits, inch forward results start inching back. And this is dude, I'm talking this takes years to happen and that's, I think we will be a lot better off if we ate something and saw the results right. then and there. But it just doesn't happen that way. It's why you don't eat a Whopper and all of a sudden break out and a heart attack. It's gradual. That's exactly. But if we, if we did, if we bit into that burger and all of a sudden grabbed our chest, we immediately felt the effects of it. Oh my God. We would change the results. And I'm using weight loss as an example, but man, you can use this analogy in relationships. You can use this in your finances. I can use it in any area in your job. You got the promotion, you got way out in front of everybody else. You started behind everybody else. They've been here for years. You got the promotion you're way out in front. And then all of a sudden you stop becoming you feel like you've arrived. And what happens going back to this analogy? The decisions, the exceptions that you make, they inch backwards until finally your left hand, which is the bad habits and your right hand, which has all the results, man. They're almost even with one another. They're webbed. I'm holding my fingers in front of my face they're web. And then what happens? Here's where it all gets really jacked. Your left hand, which was the bad habits, begin to inch forward. Actually they start picking up speed. It's a crazy thing. Red ink flows faster than black ink, right? The negatives. Look at your account. Look at your savings. You can wipe out your savings all in one transaction. Yet it takes years to build up to savings. That's what happens, what happens in sales? When we do we'll have a bad sales day. And is like, we just fall off a cliff as far as our performance for the month, but then we'll have two good smashing record-breaking days. And it's like it inched forward. The success red ink flows faster than black ink. Same thing. It's true in finances. It's true in your relationships. It's true with your weight. Loss is true in every area of lives. True in your career. So, getting back to the analogy. Once again, everything's inching backwards results start sliding backwards, poor habits creep forward. Eventually they web they're even with one another, and then the bad habits begin to take presedence. And this is where you start reminiscing and on how fine you used to be. And this is where you got to go to the store and buy a pant size bigger because, and then your belt looks like it's holding on for dear life with that third loophole, because it's actually you've left that loophole behind because it was strain. Now it's all sagging. So now you gotta go to the second loophole, loosen it up a little bit. Eventually he got by another belt. This is what happens. This is why I say, man always become and never arrive because if you're not punching at it every single day, some sort of intensity at it every day. I'm not saying, dude, you have to be Def con five every day, but you do need to be aware that whatever on the positive side, whatever you don't do, you're countering that. with something that you maybe shouldn't do or shouldn't do as often. And it actually begins to intensify cravings, kick in complacency rises, laziness, fatigue, sleep a little longer. Woe is me and it gets vicious. And then this is where condemnation kicks in. Man, complacency will kill you, and if you leave it unchecked, You're going to give everything back. And where you once used to stand on the podium of greatness. If left unchecked with poor habits subtly, eventually you're going to be in the lion's den of defeat. The habits are gradual. They gradually build up or they gradually erode it doesn't happen all at once. It happens once all the time. So I want to give you a few resources to help prime you back. You just got to get a little priming going and one of them that I didn't even write down, but it just came to mind. Stop saying stupid shit. That's the first thing. I don't even know what episode that is that I did Trevor Mowad's book, but number one, stop reminiscing about who you once were and how you once had it going on. None of that matters. The only thing that matters is what you're doing right now. Is it so let's, before I give you any, anything else shut up. If it's not something that can build you up. mentally, Emotionally physically and shut up because I get it. You don't like the way you look I'm like that right now, too. Like, you know what? I got to tighten up. I've let some things slide, tighten up. That's in bad habits, creep in. And at first they crept in. They were so far back. It didn't seem to matter, but they do and they creep in and they creep in and they get stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger, strong and strong. And then they lock you up. But when you have the awareness, now that you see it, now you can do something with it. So, let me give you some resources to always become a never arrive, go back and listen to episode 412. I'll probably bring it back around as a, as a throwback episode, episode 412 ACA, one of my favorites, ACA action cures. All. So when you're in this negotiations with yourself, ACA action cures all when you should. I shouldn't. I bust a move because if you take action. Even if it's not you, you're not all warm and bubbly. If you take that action, it's gonna squash everything else. Cause I can tell you this, even if you take some sort of productive action, even if it wasn't a perfect 10, the fact that you did it, you're reinforcing those disciplines. You're not letting the complacency kick in strong, I get it... But the ACA will keep the bad habits at bay at rhymes. All right. Episode 6 87. We just did that. PBE. Positive benefits every day. You had a punch at it every single day. So what are some things I call them? I call them beats. I was talking to a coworker of mine the other day, and I told him, I said, I have five beats that I hit every single day. And the five beats are reading, working out. Meditating praying, writing recording those are five beats. And if I hit those five beats early in the day, those are my lead domino's everything else takes care of itself. I don't care How bad the day went. Took care of me. I hit the beats some days is three. Some days I can hit four, some days I can hit all five. I hit the money shot. It's not all the time, but the fact that I have those and you have put in three, four or five beats that's positive benefits every single day, episode 6 68. This is probably one of my most favorite recent episodes and a lot of favorites, but this one is about the leads and the lags, and it really rifts off of, James Clear's book, atomic habits. And getting 1% better. What does 1% better mean? What is 1% improvement mean? A lot of, you know, there's, there's a lot of that slogan that goes around, but a lot of what does that mean? Well, it's the leads in the lags. Your leads are your effort, your lags, are your results, and many time based on the lags, the current results. We let the lags determine our leads, our next effort. And you, you, you take care of the leads and the lags will take care of themselves. Keep it simple. You got to keep the, you got to keep things simple, man. If you, if you can't, if you get too in the weeds too mechanical, too much writing too much, um, figuring out too much meal plan. If you get, if you do all of that, man, you're going to get burned out super quick. Cause you, you just can't maintain. So you got to do some things that are super, super simple to do that. You can pop, pop, pop, pop those things. All right. So that is a episode six, six. Now also I'll tell you another good one Dolvette Quince's book. I don't remember the name of it, but Dolvette Quince was, uh, the bald headed black guy that was on the biggest loser. And the one thing I got out of the book, his 3, 1, 2, 1 method, three good days of we'll just use diet, for example. This is all in a seven day week. So three days on good. Clean eating one day. Okay. You trip, you fail two back on one off. So 3, 1, 2, 1. So I like it better with a 1 3, 2, 1 method. So for me, let's say on Sundays, I like to eat mother-in-law cook. So on Sundays, I'm not going to eat very good, so I'll do a 1, 3, 1, 2 method makes it up however you want to. So on Sunday, smash it. Now I'm on the three Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, three good days. Thursday heading into the weekend. Go have drinks with friends Friday, Saturday, clean Sunday, back at it again. So mix it up however you want to, but that's a useful method for you as well. And then that way it keeps you progressively moving forward, but also it gives you some flexibility in that as well. Now, another method that will help you always become a never arrive would be double up days. This is something that I use and double up days are days where you can work out twice, these are days that you can actually build your bank up. So this way what's your much, like, say. You're doubling up on your workout days. So you have some time you're off on vacation, whatever. So you get up in the morning, you bust out a nice workout in the evening. You bust out another one or some mid day, whatever you're able to get two workouts in. And one day that becomes your bank units. So that way, when a big project comes up, Are you get sick or , um, you know, just all hell breaks loose at home, and you have to miss one of those workouts. You can go back and pull one of the reserves out of the bank and you can keep your consistency going. So you work a theme. So seven workouts in seven days. So you can still maintain that and still skip a day because you have, these units built up 30 for 30. You don't break your consistency. These are just little plays that you can do. And actually they bring benefits. Now, how do you keep track of this? What I do is on my Fitbit. I can go back and look at my double updates so I can go back and look at those days that I worked out twice. So when I have a day that comes up last night, I couldn't work out, got off super late, got off, at 9, it didn't work out. So today. I'm going to try to hit two workouts so that way I can build the bank and I can withdraw from that and use that again. This will just keep you consistent. It keeps you away from condemnation and it keeps you always becoming and never arriving the thing about habits is this the good habits or super easy to let go of, and the bad habits are hard to get away from. And wouldn't life be simple. If habits were just having. The good ones were just as easy to maintain as the bad ones are hard to shake. And so when you have rough days, They're tied to your feelings. you have the urges to succumb to those bad habits laying up on the couch. Eating a whole bunch of wrong food over drinking, whatever, and good habits are tough. And the reason being is they run opposite of your emotions. Because even when you're not feeling good, you feel kind of down. It's been rough. You have that urge to sit on the couch and developing good habits means I don't care how you feel. ACA, we'll knock it out. We'll knock out two miles. You don't want to run five, go knock out two and you force yourself. And that's why good habits are so hard to get going. And so easy to let go of, and the bad habits are, are so, so super strong. Good news is you have an awareness. Now, now you can do something with that to always become and never arrive. Thanks so much for listening to today's episode. You want more? I got you covered head over to the home of the sales life. Go to the sales life.me. That's thesaleslife.me and the top right. Are links to all the socials where I hang out and in the bottom, right. Is a microphone from you. To me, leave me a message. Let me know what's going on in your world and how it can help. I'm no hair, but I'm all ears while you're there. Enjoy thousands of free resources from blogs to podcasts and also a link to the YouTube sales life channel. Never settle. Keep selling stay sales life.