This week's episode comes from Zoe Chance's new book, "Influence Is Your Superpower: The Science of Winning Hearts, Sparking Change, and Making Good Things Happen."
I could stop right there at the title.
I met Chance through Ed Mylett's podcast and immediately had to get the book.
In this episode, I specifically talk about the use of diminishing language. "Diminishing language is hard to listen to, easy to interrupt, and forces the other party to decode what you are asking," writes Chance.
We all use diminishing language, especially when we feel the other person or situation has more power or status.
For instance, we use phrases such as,
"I could be wrong..."
"I'm sorry, but..."
"I was thinking kinda, maybe we could..."
Padding your ask, engaging in up-speak (turning a statement into a question), and using a bunch of I'm sorry's diminishes your power and slices away your confidence. This is why your voice isn't heard in meetings, nor are you getting the results you want in your life.
Luckily there is a fix for this: 3 words and a mindset.
Three words: "Just say it." No filler words. No beating around the bush.
Mindset: Focus on the other person and the future, not yourself or the past. Think about that one a second. When you lack confidence, your primary focus is on how you look and feel and you ask based on the past-meaning if you're on an 0-11 streak, you ask from a losing mindset.
Get the full explanation on this week's episode #681 of The Sales Life.
Your T.S.L. never settle question for this week: "Where can you spot the use of diminishing language in your relationships and career?"
Go to www.thesaleslife.me and let me know. In the bottom right is a mic from you to me. Click the mic and let me hear from you. I'm no hair, but I'm all ears.
Next week's episode is from Evy Pompouras's excellent book "Bulletproof. Protect Yourself. Read People. Influence Situations. Live Fearlessly." (Yes. Yes. Yes.)
Remember the greatest sales you'll ever make is selling you on you. Never settle. Keep selling no matter what.