July 16, 2025
936. If You Negotiate With Yourself, You're Dead đ”
Send us a text In this episode, I'm not talking about sales tacticsâI'm talking about the hardest sale youâll ever make: to sell you on you. Youâll learn why the internal âyeah butâ conversations are killing your momentum, how emotionsânot factsâactually drive your decisions, and why acting before you negotiate is the key to breaking through. This episode will show you: Why curiosity is the doorway to changeâand why you keep slamming it shutThe three ways you act when faced with change:...
In this episode, I'm not talking about sales tacticsâI'm talking about the hardest sale youâll ever make: to sell you on you.Â
Youâll learn why the internal âyeah butâ conversations are killing your momentum, how emotionsânot factsâactually drive your decisions, and why acting before you negotiate is the key to breaking through.
This episode will show you:
- Why curiosity is the doorway to changeâand why you keep slamming it shut
- The three ways you act when faced with change: sabotage, stagnation, or transformation
- How to make belief by stacking small wins and earning new facts about yourself
- What it really means to stop negotiating with your future and start building it
If youâve been stuck, doubting yourself, or waiting to feel ready, this oneâs your wake-up call.
Listen nowâand start selling yourself a better story.
Thank you to Bryan Eisenberg's book, "I Think I Swallowed An Elephant," for the inspiration for this episode.Â
đŁWho needs to hear this episode? Please share with ONE PERSON who needs to hear this message.
đ Watch & subscribe to episodes on my YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiNqFo05MJ6_yCu1vJ3rX4A
đShow your â€ïž by thumbing a quick rating and review for any platform: https://www.marshbuice.com/reviews/new/
đ€See my daily stories: https://www.instagram.com/marshbuice/
đ Daily thoughts on X @marshbuice
đŒ Blog posts on LinkedIn @marshbuice
đ©âđ» FREE Content! www.marshbuice.com
Keep it simple. Keep it moving. Never settle. Stay tough.
WEBVTT
00:00:00.719 --> 00:00:00.959
All right.
00:00:00.959 --> 00:00:02.069
3, 2, 1. Let's get it.
00:00:02.339 --> 00:00:06.660
This morning I opened up Brian Eisenberg's book, amazing book.
00:00:07.169 --> 00:00:11.279
I think I swallowed an elephant, and I landed on chapter 24.
00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:24.359
Facts Tell, but stories sell, and that's a phrase that we've all heard in sales training, but it goes way beyond selling a product.
00:00:24.839 --> 00:00:28.019
It's about selling yourself a new possibility.
00:00:28.934 --> 00:00:35.475
A new identity, a new life, and it starts with understanding One simple truth.
00:00:36.255 --> 00:00:41.295
Facts may tell, but stories are the things that sell.
00:00:42.134 --> 00:00:44.295
See, you can memorize every detail.
00:00:44.625 --> 00:00:57.615
You can know the features, you can understand the tech behind the features, but none of that, none of that sells the car, the house, the gym membership, or even the idea.
00:00:58.229 --> 00:01:00.659
What sells is the emotion.
00:01:01.170 --> 00:01:03.869
What sells is the story.
00:01:04.980 --> 00:01:11.760
Brian writes, action happens because of the emotion behind the facts that hit me.
00:01:12.299 --> 00:01:20.189
See, you can pile up all the logic and still go nowhere because logic doesn't move people.
00:01:20.640 --> 00:01:29.504
Emotion does, and every emotion you have to understand has an arc. It's got a rhythm, it's got a swing.
00:01:30.435 --> 00:01:32.084
I mean, think about it one minute.
00:01:32.084 --> 00:01:41.954
You believe in yourself, you're riding high, you're telling yourself you can do this, and then life creeps in and suddenly you're spiraling.
00:01:42.465 --> 00:01:44.745
You're telling yourself, I'm gonna fail.
00:01:44.984 --> 00:01:45.914
I'm not enough.
00:01:46.185 --> 00:01:46.989
I'm falling behind.
00:01:47.864 --> 00:01:51.284
And that's the emotional arc that Brian is talking about.
00:01:51.644 --> 00:01:53.504
And unless you understand.
00:01:54.164 --> 00:01:58.694
That, that swing, that arc is normal unless you even expect it.
00:01:58.694 --> 00:01:59.834
You gotta expect it.
00:02:00.825 --> 00:02:13.394
Then you're gonna start making long-term decisions in short-term states, and you're gonna end up sabotaging everything good in your life because you think the low is permanent.
00:02:14.594 --> 00:02:17.294
Brian says that change starts with curiosity.
00:02:17.594 --> 00:02:19.694
I say it's gotta stay with curiosity.
00:02:19.995 --> 00:02:23.474
You gotta stay in a state of wonder.
00:02:24.074 --> 00:02:25.125
Can I do this?
00:02:25.454 --> 00:02:26.504
Is this for me?
00:02:26.835 --> 00:02:27.974
What if it works?
00:02:28.484 --> 00:02:37.514
But you gotta understand, man, curiosity has a short fuse because right behind that curiosity comes negotiation.
00:02:38.324 --> 00:02:40.409
This is when your mind starts to talk you out of it.
00:02:41.250 --> 00:02:42.870
You start negotiating with yourself.
00:02:43.110 --> 00:02:44.009
What if I fail?
00:02:44.280 --> 00:02:45.210
What if I lose?
00:02:45.389 --> 00:02:46.469
What if I'm not enough?
00:02:46.500 --> 00:02:50.340
And once you start negotiating with yourself, bro, you're dead in the water.
00:02:50.699 --> 00:02:51.479
That's when the Yeah.
00:02:51.479 --> 00:02:52.349
Buts show up.
00:02:53.729 --> 00:02:54.599
We all know the Yeah.
00:02:54.599 --> 00:02:55.080
Buts.
00:02:55.349 --> 00:02:55.620
Yeah.
00:02:55.620 --> 00:02:56.639
But I've got kids.
00:02:56.819 --> 00:02:57.090
Yeah.
00:02:57.090 --> 00:02:58.469
But I've got all these obstacles.
00:02:58.620 --> 00:02:58.860
Yeah.
00:02:58.860 --> 00:02:59.879
But I don't have the money.
00:03:00.060 --> 00:03:00.330
Yeah.
00:03:00.330 --> 00:03:01.439
But I don't have the time.
00:03:01.650 --> 00:03:01.889
Yeah.
00:03:01.889 --> 00:03:03.525
But I don't have the followers or support.
00:03:03.905 --> 00:03:04.564
Let me be clear.
00:03:05.939 --> 00:03:06.419
The, yeah.
00:03:06.419 --> 00:03:10.079
Buts are the bricks that build your limitations.
00:03:10.169 --> 00:03:13.199
And if you don't act before they show up, those yeah.
00:03:13.199 --> 00:03:17.129
Buts, they're gonna talk you out of your goals every single time.
00:03:17.669 --> 00:03:18.719
So here's the play.
00:03:19.830 --> 00:03:23.069
You gotta act before the negotiation begins.
00:03:23.129 --> 00:03:25.949
You gotta move while you're still curious.
00:03:26.693 --> 00:03:29.453
And this is where Brian really brings it all together.
00:03:29.603 --> 00:03:31.193
See, there's an order of change.
00:03:31.612 --> 00:03:33.112
Facts sell the emotion.
00:03:33.682 --> 00:03:35.723
Emotion sells the action.
00:03:36.112 --> 00:03:39.562
Even if the facts aren't really true, it's true to you.
00:03:39.983 --> 00:03:45.263
And if that's enough to drive a feeling, that feeling drives the decision.
00:03:46.223 --> 00:03:47.872
But not all action is growth.
00:03:48.848 --> 00:03:50.108
Let me be clear about that.
00:03:50.557 --> 00:03:51.937
There are three kinds of action.
00:03:52.538 --> 00:03:53.978
You sabotage yourself.
00:03:54.608 --> 00:04:00.518
You stay the same, which really isn't staying the same because nothing stays the same or you change.
00:04:00.848 --> 00:04:01.388
That's it.
00:04:01.687 --> 00:04:08.258
You're either wrecking it, drifting in place, or doing the hard work of evolving.
00:04:09.098 --> 00:04:14.497
Brian says the turning point comes when the story you hear aligns with the emotion in that moment.
00:04:15.173 --> 00:04:22.642
Let that sit in the story you hear, meaning the story that you're telling yourself has to match the emotion of the moment.
00:04:23.663 --> 00:04:24.413
Think about that.
00:04:24.682 --> 00:04:28.762
So if you're angry, the story has to be about resolve.
00:04:28.762 --> 00:04:31.973
If you're heartbroken, the story has to be about rebuilding.
00:04:31.973 --> 00:04:35.663
If you're hopeful, the story has to be about possibility.
00:04:35.992 --> 00:04:40.043
That's when belief replaces doubt.
00:04:40.987 --> 00:04:45.877
This is when action becomes not just possible, but inevitable.
00:04:46.658 --> 00:04:50.288
This is what I mean when I say you gotta make belief.
00:04:50.648 --> 00:04:55.267
And when I say make belief, I'm not talking about Pixar, I'm not talking about Disney.
00:04:55.358 --> 00:04:58.747
If it's possible for them, it's possible for you.
00:04:59.437 --> 00:05:08.767
This is what I call earned belief, the kind that comes from showing up every single day, doing what you said you do day in, day out.
00:05:09.697 --> 00:05:13.427
You make the belief by laying the brick, take the steps, do 'em.
00:05:13.427 --> 00:05:16.187
What's hard, showing up when no one else is watching.
00:05:16.338 --> 00:05:20.028
And when you do that long enough, the story begins to shift.
00:05:20.387 --> 00:05:23.237
The facts begin to change.
00:05:24.170 --> 00:05:26.225
So let me land this straight in between your eyes.
00:05:26.661 --> 00:05:28.821
The greatest sale that you're ever gonna make.
00:05:29.286 --> 00:05:30.605
It's to sell you on you.
00:05:31.146 --> 00:05:33.755
You gotta sell yourself that you're worthy.
00:05:34.055 --> 00:05:36.456
That until is my timeframe.
00:05:36.516 --> 00:05:39.605
And that you're not going to negotiate with your future anymore.
00:05:40.055 --> 00:05:44.225
And the only way that you're gonna sell yourself on that is you gotta take action.
00:05:44.766 --> 00:05:46.086
You gotta earn new facts.
00:05:46.656 --> 00:05:49.055
Facts that say, I can do this.
00:05:49.235 --> 00:05:51.336
I am worthy, I will succeed.
00:05:51.755 --> 00:05:58.415
And once you earn those facts, and I say earn, once you earn those facts, the belief.
00:05:58.461 --> 00:06:00.560
It gets easier to sell.
00:06:01.360 --> 00:06:06.000
You stop selling from fear, and you start selling from a position of strength.
00:06:06.557 --> 00:06:11.327
So today and every day for the rest of your life, stay curious.
00:06:11.747 --> 00:06:17.478
Take action before you get into negotiations with yourself and earn your belief.
00:06:17.987 --> 00:06:21.617
Sell yourself a better story because when you do that.
00:06:22.817 --> 00:06:24.257
The facts will always follow.
00:06:24.978 --> 00:06:25.608
Let's get outta here.
00:06:25.608 --> 00:06:26.208
Keep it simple.
00:06:26.208 --> 00:06:26.838
Keep it moving.
00:06:26.838 --> 00:06:27.377
Never settle.
00:06:27.377 --> 00:06:27.947
Stay tough.
00:06:27.947 --> 00:06:28.427
Peace.
00:00:00.719 --> 00:00:00.959
All right.
00:00:00.959 --> 00:00:02.069
3, 2, 1. Let's get it.
00:00:02.339 --> 00:00:06.660
This morning I opened up Brian Eisenberg's book, amazing book.
00:00:07.169 --> 00:00:11.279
I think I swallowed an elephant, and I landed on chapter 24.
00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:24.359
Facts Tell, but stories sell, and that's a phrase that we've all heard in sales training, but it goes way beyond selling a product.
00:00:24.839 --> 00:00:28.019
It's about selling yourself a new possibility.
00:00:28.934 --> 00:00:35.475
A new identity, a new life, and it starts with understanding One simple truth.
00:00:36.255 --> 00:00:41.295
Facts may tell, but stories are the things that sell.
00:00:42.134 --> 00:00:44.295
See, you can memorize every detail.
00:00:44.625 --> 00:00:57.615
You can know the features, you can understand the tech behind the features, but none of that, none of that sells the car, the house, the gym membership, or even the idea.
00:00:58.229 --> 00:01:00.659
What sells is the emotion.
00:01:01.170 --> 00:01:03.869
What sells is the story.
00:01:04.980 --> 00:01:11.760
Brian writes, action happens because of the emotion behind the facts that hit me.
00:01:12.299 --> 00:01:20.189
See, you can pile up all the logic and still go nowhere because logic doesn't move people.
00:01:20.640 --> 00:01:29.504
Emotion does, and every emotion you have to understand has an arc. It's got a rhythm, it's got a swing.
00:01:30.435 --> 00:01:32.084
I mean, think about it one minute.
00:01:32.084 --> 00:01:41.954
You believe in yourself, you're riding high, you're telling yourself you can do this, and then life creeps in and suddenly you're spiraling.
00:01:42.465 --> 00:01:44.745
You're telling yourself, I'm gonna fail.
00:01:44.984 --> 00:01:45.914
I'm not enough.
00:01:46.185 --> 00:01:46.989
I'm falling behind.
00:01:47.864 --> 00:01:51.284
And that's the emotional arc that Brian is talking about.
00:01:51.644 --> 00:01:53.504
And unless you understand.
00:01:54.164 --> 00:01:58.694
That, that swing, that arc is normal unless you even expect it.
00:01:58.694 --> 00:01:59.834
You gotta expect it.
00:02:00.825 --> 00:02:13.394
Then you're gonna start making long-term decisions in short-term states, and you're gonna end up sabotaging everything good in your life because you think the low is permanent.
00:02:14.594 --> 00:02:17.294
Brian says that change starts with curiosity.
00:02:17.594 --> 00:02:19.694
I say it's gotta stay with curiosity.
00:02:19.995 --> 00:02:23.474
You gotta stay in a state of wonder.
00:02:24.074 --> 00:02:25.125
Can I do this?
00:02:25.454 --> 00:02:26.504
Is this for me?
00:02:26.835 --> 00:02:27.974
What if it works?
00:02:28.484 --> 00:02:37.514
But you gotta understand, man, curiosity has a short fuse because right behind that curiosity comes negotiation.
00:02:38.324 --> 00:02:40.409
This is when your mind starts to talk you out of it.
00:02:41.250 --> 00:02:42.870
You start negotiating with yourself.
00:02:43.110 --> 00:02:44.009
What if I fail?
00:02:44.280 --> 00:02:45.210
What if I lose?
00:02:45.389 --> 00:02:46.469
What if I'm not enough?
00:02:46.500 --> 00:02:50.340
And once you start negotiating with yourself, bro, you're dead in the water.
00:02:50.699 --> 00:02:51.479
That's when the Yeah.
00:02:51.479 --> 00:02:52.349
Buts show up.
00:02:53.729 --> 00:02:54.599
We all know the Yeah.
00:02:54.599 --> 00:02:55.080
Buts.
00:02:55.349 --> 00:02:55.620
Yeah.
00:02:55.620 --> 00:02:56.639
But I've got kids.
00:02:56.819 --> 00:02:57.090
Yeah.
00:02:57.090 --> 00:02:58.469
But I've got all these obstacles.
00:02:58.620 --> 00:02:58.860
Yeah.
00:02:58.860 --> 00:02:59.879
But I don't have the money.
00:03:00.060 --> 00:03:00.330
Yeah.
00:03:00.330 --> 00:03:01.439
But I don't have the time.
00:03:01.650 --> 00:03:01.889
Yeah.
00:03:01.889 --> 00:03:03.525
But I don't have the followers or support.
00:03:03.905 --> 00:03:04.564
Let me be clear.
00:03:05.939 --> 00:03:06.419
The, yeah.
00:03:06.419 --> 00:03:10.079
Buts are the bricks that build your limitations.
00:03:10.169 --> 00:03:13.199
And if you don't act before they show up, those yeah.
00:03:13.199 --> 00:03:17.129
Buts, they're gonna talk you out of your goals every single time.
00:03:17.669 --> 00:03:18.719
So here's the play.
00:03:19.830 --> 00:03:23.069
You gotta act before the negotiation begins.
00:03:23.129 --> 00:03:25.949
You gotta move while you're still curious.
00:03:26.693 --> 00:03:29.453
And this is where Brian really brings it all together.
00:03:29.603 --> 00:03:31.193
See, there's an order of change.
00:03:31.612 --> 00:03:33.112
Facts sell the emotion.
00:03:33.682 --> 00:03:35.723
Emotion sells the action.
00:03:36.112 --> 00:03:39.562
Even if the facts aren't really true, it's true to you.
00:03:39.983 --> 00:03:45.263
And if that's enough to drive a feeling, that feeling drives the decision.
00:03:46.223 --> 00:03:47.872
But not all action is growth.
00:03:48.848 --> 00:03:50.108
Let me be clear about that.
00:03:50.557 --> 00:03:51.937
There are three kinds of action.
00:03:52.538 --> 00:03:53.978
You sabotage yourself.
00:03:54.608 --> 00:04:00.518
You stay the same, which really isn't staying the same because nothing stays the same or you change.
00:04:00.848 --> 00:04:01.388
That's it.
00:04:01.687 --> 00:04:08.258
You're either wrecking it, drifting in place, or doing the hard work of evolving.
00:04:09.098 --> 00:04:14.497
Brian says the turning point comes when the story you hear aligns with the emotion in that moment.
00:04:15.173 --> 00:04:22.642
Let that sit in the story you hear, meaning the story that you're telling yourself has to match the emotion of the moment.
00:04:23.663 --> 00:04:24.413
Think about that.
00:04:24.682 --> 00:04:28.762
So if you're angry, the story has to be about resolve.
00:04:28.762 --> 00:04:31.973
If you're heartbroken, the story has to be about rebuilding.
00:04:31.973 --> 00:04:35.663
If you're hopeful, the story has to be about possibility.
00:04:35.992 --> 00:04:40.043
That's when belief replaces doubt.
00:04:40.987 --> 00:04:45.877
This is when action becomes not just possible, but inevitable.
00:04:46.658 --> 00:04:50.288
This is what I mean when I say you gotta make belief.
00:04:50.648 --> 00:04:55.267
And when I say make belief, I'm not talking about Pixar, I'm not talking about Disney.
00:04:55.358 --> 00:04:58.747
If it's possible for them, it's possible for you.
00:04:59.437 --> 00:05:08.767
This is what I call earned belief, the kind that comes from showing up every single day, doing what you said you do day in, day out.
00:05:09.697 --> 00:05:13.427
You make the belief by laying the brick, take the steps, do 'em.
00:05:13.427 --> 00:05:16.187
What's hard, showing up when no one else is watching.
00:05:16.338 --> 00:05:20.028
And when you do that long enough, the story begins to shift.
00:05:20.387 --> 00:05:23.237
The facts begin to change.
00:05:24.170 --> 00:05:26.225
So let me land this straight in between your eyes.
00:05:26.661 --> 00:05:28.821
The greatest sale that you're ever gonna make.
00:05:29.286 --> 00:05:30.605
It's to sell you on you.
00:05:31.146 --> 00:05:33.755
You gotta sell yourself that you're worthy.
00:05:34.055 --> 00:05:36.456
That until is my timeframe.
00:05:36.516 --> 00:05:39.605
And that you're not going to negotiate with your future anymore.
00:05:40.055 --> 00:05:44.225
And the only way that you're gonna sell yourself on that is you gotta take action.
00:05:44.766 --> 00:05:46.086
You gotta earn new facts.
00:05:46.656 --> 00:05:49.055
Facts that say, I can do this.
00:05:49.235 --> 00:05:51.336
I am worthy, I will succeed.
00:05:51.755 --> 00:05:58.415
And once you earn those facts, and I say earn, once you earn those facts, the belief.
00:05:58.461 --> 00:06:00.560
It gets easier to sell.
00:06:01.360 --> 00:06:06.000
You stop selling from fear, and you start selling from a position of strength.
00:06:06.557 --> 00:06:11.327
So today and every day for the rest of your life, stay curious.
00:06:11.747 --> 00:06:17.478
Take action before you get into negotiations with yourself and earn your belief.
00:06:17.987 --> 00:06:21.617
Sell yourself a better story because when you do that.
00:06:22.817 --> 00:06:24.257
The facts will always follow.
00:06:24.978 --> 00:06:25.608
Let's get outta here.
00:06:25.608 --> 00:06:26.208
Keep it simple.
00:06:26.208 --> 00:06:26.838
Keep it moving.
00:06:26.838 --> 00:06:27.377
Never settle.
00:06:27.377 --> 00:06:27.947
Stay tough.
00:06:27.947 --> 00:06:28.427
Peace.