Handle adversity. Embrace uncertainty. Never settle.
Dec. 19, 2022

736. 3 Ways To Build & Maintain Confidence

736. 3 Ways To Build & Maintain Confidence

You wouldn't build a house and never mow the grass, clean the toilets, or take out the trash. So why would you work so hard to build your confidence only to let it rot away?

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Welcome to the Sales Life. I'm your host, marsh B, and sales is a profession, but selling is a mindset that you need in order to embrace uncertainty, handle the adversity, and never settle again. In my 20 plus years of the sales profession, I've developed five disciplines that I've applied to every area of my life, including personal and professional disasters, hurricanes shortages, recessions, obesity, homelessness, demotion, and suicidal thoughts. I beat 'em all. Be ready for anything and achieve everything with the sales life mentality. Get started with your coaching today@marshbuice.com Confidence is nothing more than evidence. That's all it is, man. And the question is, what's the evidence that you're actually. . See, you have to think of confidence as a character reference, right? So say for instance, if you're interviewing me for a job and the interview went well, and you say, well, marsh, let me call you references and we'll get back to you. And you call my references and say, Hey, can you tell me a little bit about Marsh? Well, he's always late. He's been written up multiple times and we're always having to get in his ass. Well, based on that character reference, I'm not gonna get the job. I'm smoked. I'm outta there. But if instead when you call and say, Hey, can you give me a character reference on. He says he shows up on time. He's disciplined, he's gone through a lot, but man, he pushes through. He gets shit done. He's the kind of guy that you want on your team. Well, based on that reference, I'm probably gonna get the job. So back to you. Your confidence is based on your reference of getting shit done, disciplined commitment, keeping your word, always showing up. That's the reference that you're giving about yourself. Or if your reference instead is never kept your word. Always lying to yourself. You start, you never finish, you bounce out. You're just not mentally tough. See, these are things that you know about yourself, and if that's your reference that you're giving, then obviously no matter what you're walking into, you've got low confidence because that is your reference point that you're using. That's the anchor. The confidence that you earn is based on the references that you create. You gotta put these chapters in your life. Yes, you've skidded across the floor. Yes, you've messed up, but what are you building past that? That's the things man that you need to be referencing. Think about it in sales. When you're on a roll and you're doing well, you have high confidence, right? Because what you're doing is you're taking the previous deal and rolling those emotions and that that energy into your next. It just, it just starts steam rolling. This is that snowball effect where every time, man, you have such a high expectation that you keep rolling these things in there, you expect the next person to say yes to, and even if they say no, because your confidence is so high, you're able to counter it with boldness, with courage, and offer a different perspective. And the customers change their mind and they buy your confidence. But let me tell you where people go wrong. They forget that confidence must be maintained. I mean, you can have the nicest exotic car there is. If you don't properly maintain it, you're gonna be sitting in a nice car on the side of the road with a blown motor. It ain't gonna run smoothly, some shit's gonna break. And the same is true for you with your confidence. If you're not maintaining your confidence, then you're gonna lose it, and it doesn't have to be as fleeting as you think it. Confidence didn't just slip outta your hand, you just didn't properly maintain it and because life grades you on a curve, she says, come on, come on, come on. And then finally pulls the cord and says, I gave you chance after chance. So let me give you a few ways that you could maintain your confidence. The first way you maintain confidence is atf, act, think, feel, actions come first. Feelings always come dead. Last. Actions always come before the feelings. Because see, it's easier to act your way into feeling than feel your way into an action. So to maintain that confidence, there are gonna be days where you have the low water marks. You ain't feeling it. You still have to take action. And so you put that action in there because it's just part of the maintenance. Just because your car's running really good doesn't mean you never change the oil. Cause hey man, no warning lights. It's running okay. It sounds okay. I guess I'm okay. And then all of a sudden it breaks down because you didn't properly maintain. You maintain the things along the way so that way you don't have a catastrophic event. It's the same thing for you with your confidence. So you have to take action and the feelings gotta take a fucking backseat, man. The feelings will just have to catch up whenever the, because if you're waiting on your feelings to show up, Feelings will sell you out. They'll sell you that. It's okay to lay up and they'll also sell you out as soon as you lay up. Don't do it. Don't fall for it. Atf, act, think, feel. The second way to maintain your confidence is you gotta bring three different games. You have a, a, b, and a C game. Your A game is, that's the land of milk and honey. It's easy to convert. When you have your a game, when everything is flowing well, I mean, you can just look someone's way and you get the results. You cannot even ask for a job and you get the job. You just walk into a room. And someone wants to meet you. Those are the land milk and honey days. You don't have those days all the time. So when your A game is not there, you still gotta be there. You bring your B game. Your b game is where you lean heavily on your processes because things aren't quite working for you, but you lean heavily on that process, so you don't add a bunch of narrative to it or anything like that. You just, I gotta get to the checkpoints. Boom, boom, boom. These are the days where you may have to adjust your pace. But don't get off the path. You don't wanna abandon your post, you don't wanna abandon the goal. it may take you longer today. That's okay. Adjust the pace. Don't deviate from the path in your C game, your third game that you gotta bring every single day. These are knuckle up days. These are the days, man, where you're kicking and screaming emotionally, but you push yourself through. , you just knuckle up, man. You just drag it through. Your processes aren't working right? Nothing's coming together for you. Today's just a day, man. I just gotta get through. This is how I build my consistency. This is how I build my character. Didn't want do it, wanted to phone in, wanted to lay up, wanted to double up tomorrow, wanted to give all these excuses. I didn't do it. Push through. And the third way you maintain your confidence is you gotta know your numbers man. You gotta put the numbers to work and knowing your numbers is knowing exactly the task that you gotta hit today. So if you're in sales, you take your goal and divide it by your closing percentage. What is that closing percentage? So it's the goal divided by 30, 40, 50%. And be honest with yourself, that's gonna give you. The net of the number of customers that you have to work with. You divide that net of customers by the number of days that you have left in the month, and that's your daily number. You just work that number. That's all I do. And it's liberating, ma'am. When you don't have a bunch of emotions tied to the customer, the situation, the outcome. When you don't tie your emotions to it, you just say, Hey, that's just, if I gotta get a hundred customers this month, that's just part of the hundred 99 more to go customer. Blows up, peels out. 98 more to go deal, got all the way back and almost converted, didn't go through bailed. 75 more to go. I just, I just keep putting 'em in the bucket. It's hard. This is how you build your emotional agility and your maturity, but you just keep working the numbers. Now conversely, this is how you start slipping because you don't know your numbers because you're just kind of swinging in the dark. You think that it's not all your fault and you think it's one of the three P's. It's personal, permanent, or pervasive. , you're taking it personal. The numbers aren't working for you, so you abandon them. You don't even know where you are anymore because you're taking it personal. You think that it's gonna be permanent? ? Look, lemme tell you something. If you know that you can't go through life Undefeated, then why do you think that your defeat is permanent? It's not. You just gotta keep going. It's only permanent if you make it so boom, bucket, bucket, bucket. You just keep putting 'em in there and then the other reason why you abandon your numbers is cuz you think it's pervasive. You can't get anything going at work, and you get a blowout on the way home at nine o'clock at night after working with a customer, staying late three hours, missed your daughter's recital on the way home, get a blowout, and you're like, oh my God, how much worse can this get? See, it's not pervasive. It just, they're two independent events. It just happened. You did your part, things happened. You just adjust from there. Another reason why your confidence begins to slip is because you ignore small mistakes and they end up becoming big ones. If you keep the minors minor, they'll never become major. Gotta remember that, man. So the small mistakes, even though you think you can push it through, even though you think it'll go undetected, force yourself. To get it done, because if you don't, it's gonna mount up into something big, and it may be months down the road, it's gonna mount up into something big where you lose the account or you have to spend all day or all week correcting a bunch of mistakes when you could have just taken 10 or 15 minutes an hour and corrected that one. Another reason why your confidence slips is the three S's you say see and surround, you say stupid shit. You can think it all day long. Just don't speak it. Cuz when you speak it, it brings power to it. If the world was spoken into existence, how are you speaking into your world? So that's the say, the see is. You start seeing stupid shit, meaning that you come. And you vegetate in front of reality TV instead of where you could be working to enhance your skills to level up. You're getting your ass kicked because you haven't been evolving for the last three years. But instead, you wanna just see a bunch of bullshit ass tv you wanna scroll through. Social media should be another ass. You wanna scroll through social media and look at everybody else's life, but not productively. Add to. And the last reason, and the other s is you surround. You surround yourself with bullshit ass people. And some of that is you feel like that you're obligated to your old high school homies. No, you're not. It ain't your job to save them. They're on their own. You gotta take care of you. So you're surrounding yourself with people who are doing worse than you. And part of the reason is you do that. It's a way of making you feel, oh, well, my situation's not as bad. That's why people watch reality tv. They're like, oh man, well, I guess my situation's not as bad. Don't surround yourself with those kind of people. Surround yourself with people who are doing better than you. Surround yourself with people who are where you want to go. Confidence is evidence and you can create better evidence by every single day. Act, think, feel. Bring three games. Know your numbers. Keep it simple. Keep it moving. Never settle. Keep selling. Stay in the sales life.