Welcome to our new website!
July 31, 2022

709. Why is it so much easier to give advice to others & not to yourself?

709. Why is it so much easier to give advice to others & not to yourself?

You're the only one who has been with you for every breath and blinking moment. So who knows you better than you? From stars to scars, you know everything about yourself, so why not take the advice that you so brilliantly give to others? 

Today, I'll show you a few methods that I use to take counsel with myself. 

Thanks for listening. 

Selling is the #1 life skill to handle adversity, embrace uncertainty, and never settle again, but you don't have to be in sales to learn how to sell. Learn how www.marshbuice.com 

Transcript

, you know, you're the only one who has been with you for literally every breath and every blink that you've ever taken. So who knows you better than you? Why is it that we seek advice from others and rarely from ourselves today? I'll show you a few strategies that I use. To give myself advice. This is the sales life, a top 3% podcast in the world. I'm your host marsh B. And I created the sales life because I believe the number one skill that you need to embrace uncertainty, handle adversity and never settle again, is the ability to sell, but you don't have to be in sales to learn how to sell. I'll take the skills that I've learned in the sales profession and how I've applied these to every area of my. And how you can too. So if you're trying to get back up after life has slapped you down, are you trying to move up because you feel like life's kind of stalled out. If you wanna have more, do more, be more, then you're gonna have to learn to sell more. I'm so lucky to be here with you. Thank you to those who have rocked with me for so many years. And if you're new here, be sure and subscribe. So that way you don't miss any future episodes. So let's talk a little bit about advice. Why is it? We can give the best advice to others yet, not heed it ourselves. , a friend can call you and tell you a little bit about the problem. I mean, just life is crushing them kind of problem. And you're able to just sit back and listen. And when they're done speaking, you seem to have the perfect answer that they were so blinded to. And they're like, oh my God. Wow. Thank you yet when the tables are turned and you're in this similar situation. It's like, dude, you have no idea what to do. It's like, you totally forgot everything. I mean, the spot on perfect answer. You should do this for a living oh my God. You're the modern day. Dr. Phil is like, you totally forgot everything. You told others. Man I've had this happen so many times. So lemme tell you a few methods that I use to emotionally distance myself and give myself advice as if I were giving it to someone else. Many times when you're struggling, you tend to talk about a problem and seem to have no solutions. One method that was useful for me was channeling someone else's voice. Until I discovered my own and I did this by writing word for word from books and podcast over and over again this gives you access to the most. Brilliant powerful thought leaders that ever walk the earth and they don't have to know you for you to get to know them. Just pick up a book, listen to audio books, find a podcast, watch a video of anyone that you admire. And begin to dictate the steps they took, to become successful. Another way that I give myself advice when I was at my lowest of lows , I began writing letters to myself. And I got the idea from Eric Greiten's book, "Resilience." Great book, the book is a compilation of letters from one Navy SEAL to another, Greitens would write letters to Walker who. The Navy seals are an elite bunch. The rarest of rare yet Walker couldn't seem to adjust to normal everyday life. And he was slowly killing himself. Greitens wrote letters to Walker using some stoic philosophy, methods of acceptance. Reappraisal an expression in an effort to help Walker get his life back together. So in the same manner, I wrote letters to marsh as if I were the other guy. And it was through the emotional distancing. I was able to offer encouragement, words of perspective and plant seeds of a better future. If only I kept fighting, see journaling in the first person didn't work for me because I was too close to the flames and I needed someone. Who understood what I was going through, but they literally weren't in the fight with me. So I channeled that style of the book and began writing letters to myself. The last method that I use to give myself advice. And this is the method I most commonly use today is I talk to myself. I do it all the time. Uh, I do it on my walks. I do it to, and from work. I do it when I'm on my runs. I talk to myself while sitting in the recliner. I did it right before I turned on this microphone. In the same manner as writing letters to myself. When I talk to myself, I'm able to emotionally distance and really ask genuine questions. How are you feeling? I mean, everybody walks by and says that to you, right? Hey man, how you doing? I'm good. Everybody says that, but see, when I'm trying to give myself advice and I'm sometimes just balled up frustrated, I'm happy, tired, hopeless, whatever, whatever it is for that day. And sometimes dude, I don't even know why just beat myself up Talking to myself by emotionally. Distancing is a way I can genuinely ask myself how you doing. And then I switch back to the first seat, the first marsh. I just voice out my frustrations. I talk about my struggles. I talk about why I'm happy. I talk about why I'm sad. I just talk and the other marsh sits there and listens. He doesn't cut marsh off. He just listens. That venting and the distancing creates that space in between to offer some answers. Words of encouragement, advice, hope. Sometimes there are the kick and ass kind of moments where I say, dude, you better stop bitching, better. Get yourself together. All right. This is a tough situation. What you're gonna do about it? Sometimes I don't need the advice. Sometimes I need to kick an ass and that's what these moments are. And other times, man, what I'll do is I'll run ideas by myself. I'll talk about and let the distancing marsh hear it out and punch holes in it. Offer some different perspectives. It's the same thing I would do for someone else. Why wouldn't I do it for myself? I come first. I'm the most important person in my life. I should matter most to myself. This is what that ability does. There, there will be time to get feedback and advice. And perspectives from others, but sometimes man, you just need a little mono. Oh man. A little one on one. Just to hear it out, just to talk it out and just to help see yourself rise. This distancing is so powerful because the same way that you would give advice to a coworker or a friend or a loved one is the same advice that you give. And you take from yourself after all who knows better than you, right give it a try today. Thanks for being a part of the sales life for more Onellis life, go to marshbuice.com . That's MARSH BUICE and then the bottom right. Is a mic from you to me, let me know what's going on in your world and how I can help. I'm no hair, but I'm all ears. While you're at MARSHBUICE.COM. Enjoy thousands of free resources from blogs to videos to of course, podcast episodes. Remember the greatest sale that you will ever make is the sale. On you because you're more than enough. Stay amazing. Stay in the sales life.