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July 24, 2022

705. Anchors. Which ones to hold onto & which ones are holding onto you?

705. Anchors. Which ones to hold onto & which ones are holding onto you?

There are anchors in your life, and there are anchors in your life. Find the anchors to hold onto throughout your storms and discover the ones that keep you from realizing your full potential.

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Transcript

You know, there are anchors in your life and then there are anchors in your life. Some anchors you need in your life, but others, you need the let go of today on the sales life. I want to help you identify which anchors you need to hold on to. And which anchors are holding on to you, this is the sales life, a top 3% podcast in the world. I'm your host Marsh Buice and I created the sales life because I believe the number one skill that you need in your life to embrace uncertainty, handle the criticism, be ready for anything and never settle. Again is the life skill of selling. But you don't have to be in sales to learn how to sell. I'll take the skills that I've learned by the sales profession, and I'll show you how I have applied those to every area of my life and how you can. So, if you're trying to get back up after life has slapped you down, are you trying to move up? Because you feel like your life is stalled out. If you're trying to have more, do more, be more, then you're gonna have to learn to sell more. Welcome to the sales life. I'm so lucky to be here with you. I do. I feel so lucky and fortunate. To be right here with you for another week, I'm so grateful for you and the support that you've shown me for so many years. So let's talk about anchors and there are two types of anchors in your life. And some of the anchors, you need 'em, but you're not fully utilizing 'em. And then there are other anchors in your life that you're gonna have to identify and learn to let go of if you truly wanna find peace and prosperity in your life. So, let me break the two anchors down for you. See in life, you're gonna go through some very difficult situations and you're gonna have some very difficult seasons in your life. You can't go through life unscathed and in these seasons, you're going to have some bad storms. And when you're in these storms, It's so important that you quickly grab hold of the anchors that you need that will buoy you in these storms. The purpose of today's episode is to help you. Pre-identify the anchors that you need, it it's almost as if you have you, you know when expecting parents pack a bag because the birth could come at any day. So instead of in the heat of the moment, trying to run around and figure out what they're gonna put in that bag, they already pre-packed a bag when their emotions are dampened and they can logically work through and figure out what needs to go in the bag. And what does. They have it readily available so they can grab it without even thinking, because there are other things that they need to tend to, besides what to put in that bag. This is why you need to identify anchors ahead of time in your life. As if you're packing a bag, you're an expecting parent. You're expecting these storms. The storms are gonna come. So you're expecting these things ahead of time and you have your bag, your anchors already set already positioned. So that way you can grab. At a moment's notice. So let me give you a few of the personal anchors that I've used in my life, and hopefully they can help you too, and these are in no particular order, but the first anchor in your life are confidants. Family members loved ones, but let me give you a qualifi. If they're going to be a positive anchor in your life, those confidantes family members loved ones must help you regulate your emotions through acceptance, reappraisal, and also expression. Go back and listen to a few episodes back where we talked about how to regulate your emotions through acceptance, those confidants, those family members, those loved ones. They help you accept what it is. It's a tough situation. Not gonna sugarcoat it. They help you reappraise it. Appraisal is what is reappraisal is putting a different spin. On how you can look at it through a different lens and expression. Is those confidants, those loved ones, those family members, they don't make it all about them. They don't try to Trump your storm and say, well, let me tell you about my storm. No, they let you express it, but they're also not going to let you dig a ditch. They're not gonna go down the rabbit hole with you and they're not gonna make the situation worse. The right productive anchors in your life are the ones that help you build a bridge. So that's the qualifier. So you need that, that productive anchor. And maybe these are people that you talk to all the time, but sometimes, maybe these are people that you just talk to every so often. Now I wanna tell you this, your children are not your anchors. So when you're in a storm, you are not permitted. To dump on them and tell them about every single wall you you're going to bring them down and, and they want to desperately help you, but they, they're not there for that. You need to set the example on yeah, you can give 'em little glimpses. Hey, this is tough. That's alright. Dad's gonna get through it. That's all they need to see, but you were not permitted to use them as an anchor in your life, other than just setting the example, Another anchor that you need to hold on to in your storm is your job. So many times, one of the first things people let go of when they're going through a personal storm, they abandon their post. They leave their job behind because they're so focused on them, but you gotta understand, man, the job that you're at, you're responsible for other people. And if you're higher up. You're responsible for even more people. But also the reason why you were hired was because you were entrusted to bring about results. On the other side of this storm, you're going to get through moments are short. Life is long. It's not the other way around. So this is a tough moment, maybe for a while, but don't abandon your post. There are people that are counting on. And let me tell you something. It. Ain't all about you. Everybody there that you work with is going through some sort of storm. And some of them probably have it way worse than you, and you don't even know because they got a job to do. They got things to do, Even when you're losing in certain areas of your life, doesn't mean you have to lose in every area of your life. So hold on to this anchor I speak from personal experience, because even when all hell was breaking loose in my personal life, the fact that I could come onto my job. And find a little isolation, little bit, it was like a little bitty island. I could just be there and I could make a difference in other people's lives. Not only to my customers, but also coworkers. I could, I could make a difference. Yes, it was all breaking down outside, but this was kind of like my Haven. This is why you see athletes that play on the heels of losing. A loved one. They do this because their career is their anchor. It's a source of isolation that they can get away from it all and just play the game. And this is the kind of concept, man that you have to have, that your job is something, man, that on the backside of this you're gonna need. And. Moving forward. You're going to learn so much more about yourself because you were able to balance the two very difficult worlds and being able to keep it all together and not lose your shit with customers and coworkers while also handling the shit and going through those tough times. One thing that has helped me is pocketing the emotion, and then recycling that energy. So pocket the emotion, the thing that stirs up the, you get, you get the phone call or you start thinking about the storms and they stir up these negative emotions, pocket that, but use the energy that it drummed up. To bring some productive value while you're there at your job. Another anchor that you need to hold onto in your storms is working out. In addition to people abandoning their post at work, they let their health go down. When I was depressed. Demoted and broke. I ran every single day. I didn't let my health slide. And that is the only reason I didn't put a gun in my mouth. And my daughter was just talking about this the other day. She's like, I remember so many times, dad, I didn't understand it. You, you came home. We'd been in, in the apartment all day. You said, hi, you handed us McDonald's you put on running shoes and you went right back out the door. And I told her, I said it was the only thing that I could do to keep my sanity. I was losing everything and I was scared. And so it was the only win that I had in my life. So I just hit the pavement. So that way I could just try to work some things out and kind of exhaust those negative emotions and check the box that I did something productive with my life that day. when you're going through hell, don't stop working out. That's that's an anchor for you. It's a way that you can kind of get away from it all. Really just take your frustrations out on a barbell or on the road so important because you gotta be mentally and physically fit to take on this war that you're in another anchor for me to hold onto in my storms are books, videos, and podcast. So ahead of time, pick out a few nightstand books, books that you can quickly reference to. I have three of them. One is unbroken. It's the story of Louis Zini. I think he ran in the Olympics, ended up fighting in the war, got shot down and had to endure nearly losing his life in prison camps. It was terrible. I think they made a movie about it, but I won't watch the movie cuz the book is that good and I don't wanna ruin it. So that's one of the books. The other ones are the four agreements by by Don Miguel Ruiz, and then Jeff Olson, slight edge advantage. That is the book that changed everything in my life. So what are your nightstand books that you can quickly reference to in your time of need? Also download. Your favorite YouTube videos in podcast episodes, you can, you can just hit the button, download it. And it's important that you do that ahead of time because when your mind's all clouded, you're not gonna be able to think straight. So if you have those already in your library, you could push 'em without even thinking. Now let's talk about some anchors that are holding you down. The first one is friends and family. They're holding you down and I know you love them, but you're going to have to love them from a distance. And you're going to have to make yourself unavailable to them. I mean, you don't have to tell them. You don't, you just have to distance yourself. You just have to be unavailable. So when they text you, when they call you, man, I'd love to, I'm actually on my way to the gym, man. I'd love to, I gotta stay late at work and stay late at work. You gotta do it. You have to, because if you have to constantly pick them up bail, 'em out or explain why you're working so hard to improve your life. Or if they're the ones who are reinforcing bad habits are stirring up negative emotions. You gotta get away from these people they're draining you and you don't owe them anything. Another anchor that is holding you down is your negative speech. Go back to Trevor Mowad's book. It takes what it takes. It's the four SSEs stop saying stupid shit. Why talk about things that you don't want, just be quiet. You can think 'em all day long. Just don't give any voice to 'em. Cuz when you give voice to those things it's written in the Bible, life and death come from the power of the tongue. You speak that, you put those things in motion. Stop saying it. You can think it just don't say it. Another anchor. That is holding you down, could be a toxic work environment or toxic coworkers. And, you know, you may not be in that position where you can just chunk the deuce and quit. You have obligations. I get that. But if you're on a sink and ship, find a way off that boat. So what I want you to do. If you're in a toxic work environment, you got a toxic manager, leverage your workplace to amass all the skills you possibly can in buying your time. So that way, when the opportunity presents itself, you didn't dull down. You dominated even secretly. And then you can take the, you can take that move. It's important that when you're around a toxic work environment and toxic people don't act like them and be very strict in your process, you gotta play the game. Until you can find a new game to play also, one thing that'll help you from separating the toxic work environment is finding some sort of creative outside of work and that'll help balance you through your storms. Another anchor that is holding you down is news music and crime stories. I watch nearly no news and I get my news briefs on Twitter. I go to my app, I open it up in about 45 seconds. I found out in every category what's going. I don't need to read anything else. Music don't listen to music that is going to pull you down or is gonna take you back to an emotion that's trying to get away from or thought that you're trying to get away from. Don't listen to that. Create a playlist that pushes you to go harder. And also podcast podcast could be the thing that's pulling you down. I I'm amazed how many crime episodes there are out there and they like dominate the podcast charts. I just don't understand that. And when you're in a storm, that is the absolute, last thing you need to listen to. I like a good horror movie. I like a good suspense thrill. I do, but there are certain seasons. I don't want any part of it. And so when you're in that very delicate situation, in a tough, tough storm, that is not the thing to be feeding into your ears. The thing that is different from watching. A movie versus a podcast. A podcast is just so much more intimate, man, because you can take it anywhere. And so when you're cleaning the kitchen, you're mowing the yard. You're driving down the road, you're jogging down the road. If you're feeding yourself something, man, like a crime store, you're just, it's just, it's just eating away at you. It could plant the seed that could lead you down the wrong path. So just not right now, get away from that. You can come back to it another time if you so choose. So let me ask you this. What else would you add to this list? I want you to identify the anchors that you can hold onto, but also identify the anchors that are holding on to you. These are tough decisions, but necessary to find the peace and the prosperity that you truly deserve. Thanks for being a part of the sales life for more on the sales life podcast, go to marshbuice.com that's M a R S H B U I C E. And in the bottom, right. Is a mic from you to me, let me know what's going on in your world and how I can help. I'm no hair, but I'm all ears while you're there at marshbuice.com there are thousands of free resources from videos to blogs, to of course, podcast episodes. With that, remember the greatest sale that you will ever make is to sell you on you because you're more than enough. Stay amazing. Stay in the sales life.